i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
i've created a new STD.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
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