You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
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