you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
