why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Randomize
