why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
You ruined the universe
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
