Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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