I'm lost and stupid without you.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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