Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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