Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
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