I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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