i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
