Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
