his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
