Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
