Texts From Last Night

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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.

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  (201): she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake. http://tfl.nu/meow
  Replies (19) Good night (653) Bad night (1259)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.

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  (443): Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry. http://tfl.nu/7406
  Replies (19) Good night (928) Bad night (3290)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.

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  (713): Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana. http://tfl.nu/xlmv
  Replies (48) Good night (1255) Bad night (2660)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference

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  (248): apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference http://tfl.nu/k6zm
  Replies (33) Good night (6802) Bad night (1399)
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  (989): View more from Michigan

  We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.

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  (989): We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning. http://tfl.nu/h1ay
  Replies (23) Good night (5237) Bad night (853)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.

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  (570): You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians. http://tfl.nu/d2bn
  Replies (20) Good night (6062) Bad night (1356)
• Favorite

  (563): View more from Iowa

  The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.

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  (563): The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic. http://tfl.nu/t1x0
  Replies (10) Good night (4803) Bad night (1154)
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  (501): View more from Arkansas

  Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.

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  (501): Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure. http://tfl.nu/9bef
  Replies (7) Good night (1117) Bad night (4445)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.

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  (405): I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday. http://tfl.nu/si72
  Replies (6) Good night (2025) Bad night (744)
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  (802): View more from Vermont

  He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow

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  (802): He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow http://tfl.nu/7xi8
  Replies (18) Good night (3275) Bad night (878)
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  (731): View more from Tennessee

  He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.

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  (731): He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver. http://tfl.nu/fyob
  Replies (8) Good night (2191) Bad night (615)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.

  (443): View more from Maryland

  hey man, it was for science okay.

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  (413): dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs. (443): hey man, it was for science okay. http://tfl.nu/r3mr
  Replies (10) Good night (1473) Bad night (517)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.

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  (406): We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned. http://tfl.nu/5o0t
  Replies (4) Good night (1264) Bad night (591)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"

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  (410): he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco" http://tfl.nu/ntm8
  Replies (4) Good night (1016) Bad night (352)
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.

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  (740): Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer. http://tfl.nu/j7d4
  Replies (1) Good night (583) Bad night (307)

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