I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
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