Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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