How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize