you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize