Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
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