i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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