Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
