remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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