I cockslap morals
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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