hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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