i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Randomize
