I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
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So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
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