We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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