It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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