You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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