i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
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