What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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