I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize