Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Randomize
