on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
