just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Randomize
