He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
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He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
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Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
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