I'm gonna have a badass scar
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
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