You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
home. puking in laundry basket.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize