no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Randomize
