ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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