I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
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