We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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