Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
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