i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
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