Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Randomize
