I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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