he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
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Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
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I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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