She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...