but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Randomize