So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
