Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
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